29 and 30 Weeks

Another post with lots to report.

Since I last wrote, we've had our Wilmington baby shower. It was VERY well attended and we got lovely things. Many things that were beautiful, many that were practical, and a few that crossed into both categories. One thing is for certain after the shower; Emma should never be cold. We got countless handmade blankets for her. Some were family heirlooms, some were made for her, all were special. I kept imagining her lying on them for pictures. Some of the gifts we best remember off the top of our heads Dan's baby carrier and diaper bag, a pink hippo rattler in honor of a family friend who died who loved hippos, a handmade green smocked outfit for Emma, embroidered goodies made by Dan's aunt, my diaper bag with "W-R" on it in aqua, and a ultrasound piece of art made by Gray, my cousin.

My brother really wanted to get us the car seat that we registered for, but it was constantly out of stock. So he ended up giving us a gift card to go toward that purchase. In a lot of ways, I'm really glad it didn't work out that he got the car seat, because after the shower I did some exhausting and frustrating research about car seats, strollers, and their combos called "travel systems." I became quite overwhelmed with all the statistics and reviews. Eventually, however, we chose a Graco travel system, tried it out in person at a local Toys-R-Us, and then used two gifts cards to purchase it at target.com. It came super quickly and now we have a car seat and stroller, which count for two of the biggest items on my "priority list." So yay for my brother!

Also, since my last blog, Dan and Alan rocked putting down the flooring in the nursery, living, and dining areas of the house. And they even managed to accomplish it all in one day, rather than in two. Which means Dan also got to relax the Sunday of that weekend, which he really needed. On the Saturday that they worked, my job was mostly to stay out of the house and provide lunch when it was time. So I spent the morning at my mom and dad's house completing my list of people who I wanted to write thank you notes for. I had an extremely frustrating conversation with both of my parents, individually, about doula services. My dad's tone of voice most resembled disgust. The stress of these conversations weights extremely heavily on me. Last Wednesday, I worked very hard to process my thoughts in a written form that I could share with them. My key points of communication were: They don't have to be pro-doula, but they do have to respect our decision to have a doula. Their negativity was causing me stress, which is not good for me nor is it good for Emma, so I would not be accepting it anymore. And I printed out a few different articles about doulas that included a combination of information and statistics. I think we have gotten to a point where I can talk with them in the future and not feel so anxious, angry, and stressed. In short, I think the conversation went about as well as it could have.

Back to the Saturday with the flooring. The second big thing that kept me out of the house was first ever "birth circle" at a local place called Tmuffin. My friend Machelle and I, along with her newborn, Emmie, met with several other moms and moms-to-be. Members in the group shared their birth stories. I shared my pregnancy story and about my parents. The group helped me process further what I ended up sharing above. One thing is for sure, the more I learn, the happier I am with our decision to hire Julie as our doula.

After the flooring was completed, Dan went to my parents' and got all the shower gifts and our crib and mattress! This past weekend, he put the crib together! The nursery is really starting to come together and look like a place where Emma could live! Some of the big items we still need are a bassinet for our bedroom, because that's where she'll sleep for the first little while. We would like to have a glider and ottoman that we've registered for. A big thing about that for me is that we have such a small home, that we don't have a lot of chairs. In the nursery right now, there is only a rocker that has been in my family for decades. I'm hoping that we get the glider/ottoman so that I have a place to sit, as does anyone else visiting us. We would also like a second car seat for Dan's car. Although, for a while we could probably make due with the one we have, especially while I'm on maternity leave.

Yesterday was our last birthing class at the hospital. I hope to take the time soon and type up all my notes from the class because there was so much information that I feel certain I need to review it. Another big item on our agenda soon needs to be calling a pediatrician's office and seeing if we or I can schedule a time for a tour. I think our first choice right now is a place called Carolina Pediatrics. Two doctor's offices were recommended to us when I asked on an online parenting group. But with the second office, from my understanding, you have to take that office's particular birthing classes and frankly, there's just no time for that.

As of now, Dan and I have had three maternity photo shoots. The first one, we did at Fort Fisher near Carolina Beach. I wore a long striped sun dress with a bright blue short-sleeved sweater. Dan wore a bright blue shirt with khaki pants. The day was quite cloudy for most of the shoot, but several of the shots were absolutely lovely. We did get about 10-15 minutes of sunshine breaking through the clouds, which led to some awesome silhouetted photos. Then we did a shoot downtown by the boardwalk. We dressed up a bit more for that one. Dan wearing a cranberry colored button up shirt and his gray suit pants. I wore a dark purple dress with a shawl that turned out not to coordinate with my dress as much as I hoped it would. But from the "teaser" photos I've seen so far, I especially like the black and white photos in those outfits. The last shoot was a Hugh MacRae park. I really liked what we wore then. I had a dark gray sweater dress with a periwinkle tank top underneath. I also wore tall black boots I just got to accommodate my swollen pregnancy feet. Through the loving efforts of a friend and an amazing hairdresser, Dan and I also were both able to get haircuts before these last two shoots, making me feel much more comfortable about our curliness for the photos. The teasers from the park shoot have been nice so far. I can't wait to see more!

Yesterday, I went for a routine appointment at my ob/gyn. Everything was going okay for a while. I learned that the pelvic/groin pain I've been experiencing is "normal." Which is both good and bad. The good part is huge because it means that nothing is wrong. The bad news is that I have to cope with the pain. It occurs most when I've slept through the night and first try to stand. But it's also quite awful when I try to get up after sitting for a while. The doctor explained that my pelvic bones and muscles are practicing stretching outward to eventually prepare for birth. But that also means, that each time I stand that pain ensues because the muscles and bones are having to move closer together again. Fun stuff! The less fun stuff happened in the appointment when they checked Emma's heart rate. It has been in the low to mid 150s my entire pregnancy. But yesterday, it was in the 190s. The doctor said she was moving around a ton, which could cause the heart rate spike. But she wanted to monitor is because having moments of her heart rate being that high was okay, but it was a concern if it stayed there. So they tried to get me in a belly band with a heart and uterus monitor. However, Emma was moving around so much, they weren't able to catch her heart rate for more than a few seconds at a time. Acknowledging that their machine was not the best, they decided to send me to triage at the hospital. I cannot even begin to say how much I didn't want that to happen. But of course I wanted to make sure things were okay, so to the hospital I headed. In the meantime, I updated Dan via text. I didn't think he would or could come. But he shared that when he went to update his boss that he started to cry, and then told me that he needed to come; for his own peace of mind. Thinking of him getting choked up and worried made me cry too. So we both ended up at the hospital with my belly being monitored for quite some time. Definitely not how I had been hoping the day would go. But they said everything looked find. Her rate stayed within good limits. My blood pressure and heart rate also looked okay. They made sure I had an appointment set up soon for a follow-up, otherwise I think they would have scheduled me for one.

A couple things we did learn from the on-call doctor are that my doctors might start checking my BPP, or biophysical profile. These are numbers that will tell them if I need to have Emma sooner rather than later, especially with my gestational diabetes. She also talked about how I might need to be induced, also because of the GDS. The word "toxic" was used to describe what sugar is to my placenta. Basically, it sounds like sugar will cause the placenta to potentially break down sooner than a healthy placenta. All in all, having gestational diabetes just sucks on so many levels. I now have a list of questions I want to talk to one of my doctors about next week. Speaking of, that's also our next ultrasound. We've invited both of our moms. I'm not totally happy about the thoughts of them in the room with us. I think I invited them more out of a sense of obligation. My mom has been blunt and very clear for months that she wanted to be at an ultrasound. And I couldn't invite my mom without also inviting Dan's. I hope it'll be okay. We do think that we'll ask them to leave at some point when we want to talk with the doctor about some of our concerns. I'd just feel more comfortable overall if it was just us in those times.

As for Emma these past couple of weeks. At week 29, she was compared in size to a pineapple. She is supposedly getting big enough that her larger movements won't be potent. That's what they SAY but I certainly haven't felt that yet because her movement still get me to jumping on a regular basis. Her size is definitely increasing my acid reflux and indigestion. I've been having more trouble sleeping because of it. Her lungs and muscles continue to mature and I've been encouraged to keep up protein and iron intake. Soon, her movements are supposed to plateau to the point they'll stay for the remainder of my pregnancy. Hormones are relaxing my muscle tissues which are preparing me for birth. At the same time, this may be causing some of my pain and indigestion. Super!

At week 30, she is compared to the size of a cantaloupe or butternut squash, depending on the source. Her lanugo, or body hair, may be falling off as she prepares for delivery. She's supposedly going to be putting up to half a pound a week until she is born. Her eyes are in place but still developing. She can open them, but her vision is extremely poor. At this point, most babies will move from a breech position to the placement that makes it easier for birth. Head down! Apparently, I could also notice the return of mood swings. Well, that is for damn sure because I have been weepy and angry at some point nearly every day for a while now. I've also been sleepy more, which is not surprising considering I'm having more difficulty sleeping. It doesn't help when we have dreary, rainy days like today.

On our agenda this week: writing our birth plan! Dan's parents are also coming on Saturday. His dad will help with the shoe molding in the house. His mom and I will probably run a couple errands together. And then I'm hoping for a Sunday of more progress in the house. More soon!

Photos from these past couple weeks:

28 Weeks

What a busy time it's been lately! So many things to share about in this blog. So much that I'm sure I'll forget something. So I think chronologically listing things will be the best choice for most complete recall. This has also been the most Emma-focused week we've had so far during my pregnancy.

Last Monday, we started out birthing classes at the hospital. I appreciate our main instructor. She'll be teaching us 3 out of our 4 classes. Because of the short duration, we dove right in. The information was overwhelming, but good. I'm grateful that we're doing it. I imagine most things will come through coaching and instinct when the time for labor finally arrives, but hopefully something will be able to be recalled in the moment because of the information we've been exposed to. 

Last Wednesday, Sally and Alan (one of my co-workers and her husband) came over and Dan and Alan discussed putting in the flooring we've bought. My goal to be helpful beforehand, is to pack up small things like DVDs and books, so that shelves and whatnot can be more easily moved for flooring installation. Alan seemed pretty positive about the process, even though it seems completely overwhelming to me. My main goal during the initial weekend when they'll work is to stay out of the house and out of the way. Hopefully, I'll also run 1-2 food runs each day. I still want to do something as a thank-you for him. Not sure what it'll be yet.

On Thursday, it was the busiest day yet. We had two doctor's appointments, one with our specialist, and one with an NP at the regular ob-gyn office. The two appointments were back-to-back and wore me OUT. One of the best moments was when they switched the ultrasound screen over to a 3D image of Emma. It was not something we planned on, nor were we expecting it to happen. But all of a sudden, there she was. She looked like a real person. She has adorable chunky cheeks and a developing personality already! She was also very clearly tired of being poked during the process, because she was throwing up her arms in a clear "Stop it!" gesture. I was very weepy actually seeing her squishy little face. Then, after we left the second appointment, we drove to my parents' house to borrow their truck. We went and picked up the flooring which at arrived at the store. Once we came home, wonderful Dan unloaded it all by himself because even single boxes were much too heavy for me to pick up. Then, back to my parents' we traveled to return the truck, the off to Dan's softball game (which they won!). Finally, we came home and both crashed from that very loooong day.

Friday was our second meeting with our doula. Although, it was our first official meeting with her after we'd decided to hire her. She asked lots of questions and started filling out some informational paperwork on us. We also began the conversation around our birth plan. Here's what I know so far: I want to labor at home for as long as possible. As soon as I think I'm in labor, I'll call Julie and she'll come over. I have also decided that I don't want to let anyone know my labor has begun yet because I want to contain things for as long as possible. Julie went over some labor positions I could be in. I also got my baby carrier from her; the one with all the good mojo. It felt like a wonderful conversation overall.. She also left me with three books and a set of affirmation cards. I plan on going through, picking out my favorites, and making my own group. I want to make sure this is in there: "I can do this." It may sound simple, but I feel like it's going to be a very important message to remind myself.

Saturday brought Dan's parents into town for our first baby shower! I had been needlessly worried that people would say hurtful things, but everyone was so sweet. Several family members, friends, and Wrightsboro people came. We got lovely gifts. They were a combination of practical and personalized. The food was delicious, the sweet support was overwhelming, and the whole experience was fun, exhausting, and wonderful. The rain even held off until after the shower. We took all the gifts to my parents' house so we have less things here during our flooring adventure. So while I'm sad not to have things here to go through and play with, I am grateful for the place to hold things during our renovation. Some of the gifts that really stood out to me: a handmade blanket Dan used in his childhood that was made by his great-grandma Justice; my awesome diaper bag that my mom got "W-R" embroidered on; a handmade smocked outfit from a Wrightsboro church member; a fancy bouncer/mover that we'll be able to put Emma in and have her automatically moving to hopefully comfort her; and Dan's baby carrier! It was a lovely, tiring, smiley time. 

Sunday, we slept in. Dan started pulling up the carpet in the nursery while I began on some thank you notes. Then I took a late shower to keep my hair as frizz-less as possible because we were getting our first round of maternity photos taken! We went down to Fort Fisher and took photos in the amazing and crooked trees down there as well as on the beach. I was worried that the sun wouldn't make any appearance during our shoot, but we got 10-15 minutes of glorious sunshine with beautiful and colorful clouds. I only saw a few pictures on her camera, but I liked them. I can't wait to see more! But it may take 1-2 weeks before we do. I'll just have to hold my breath!

As I said, a very busy week!

As for me this week, I'm officially in my third trimester! How crazy is that!? Apparently, her viability percentage at this point is around 80%. Each week I keep her in and cooking, the better off she is! As for my symptoms this week, I'm still dealing with carpal tunnel in my hands. My heartburn has been worse, but I was told at the doctor that I'm not taking as much Zantac as I could, so thankfully I've increased the dosage of that and have been able to get a couple nights with better sleep. Emma is doing wonderfully. At 28 weeks on the nose, most of her measurements were between 28 weeks 5 days and 29 weeks 3 days. They estimate that she's currently around three pounds. My app tells me she's the size of a coconut or a head of cauliflower. Emma is getting better at controlling her own body temperature, which is major for the pregnancy because it means she is getting closer to sustaining herself. Also, her adrenal glands are now secreting androgen or estrogen, which signal to my body to begin lactation. She also continues to dream, but about what, who knows?! I also feel her kick all the time. Some of her kicks and punches pack a wallop and make me jump! Many of the people I'm around on a regular basis have learned what these jumps mean and usually just ask, "Emma?" smilingly. Yep, usually.

That's all for now! More soon!

26 & 27 Weeks

Well first off, my blood pressure has been better as I've been checking in. I think dropping out of a few things has really helped lower my anxiety. Laughter also helps. Which occurred with an absolutely ridiculous interaction: One morning recently, I was reaching up into a kitchen cabinet to get a jar of peanut butter. In the process, I knocked down a container of cocoa powder...which opened and spilled EVERYWHERE. All over the counter, the fronts of the kitchen drawers, the stove, the floor, and on me. All over my shirt and the brand new pair of pants I finally broke down and bought to accommodate my baby belly. This morning, Dan happened to have a late morning for work. He was lying back down in bed, but I went into the bedroom, stunned at what happened. I managed to share that I needed help. He popped out of bed ready to do what he could. He even managed to keep his laughing to a minimum! Then he had the goofy and brilliant suggestion to vacuum the powder up. The best part is that he vacuumed my outfit. You read that right. He vacuumed my outfit. I was shaking with giggles the whole time. But it really helped! My outfit was wearable! I swear, I felt like I was in an "I Love Lucy" episode.  

Having these moments of giggles have been good when they come, because my temper and patience have been shorter. I have been using Dan as a sounding board to find out when my feelings are somewhat reasonable and when they're really off kilter. For example, my mom keeps trying to get me to decide about things that are much lower on my priority list right now - like what outfit I want to have to wear at the hospital after the baby is born. That's much lower on my than other things. And Dan pointed out that I still have a whole trimester, therefore three months, to go before my due date. So buying something this early on would probably not be a good idea. Also, she wanted me to pick something out so she could give it to me at our baby shower next weekend, and I'm pretty uncomfortable with the idea of opening a gift with clothing in my size. I'm very self-conscious about it. There was one time this week, though, when I didn't feel like they were though. Dan and I have decided to hire a doula. It's a concept we first became familiar with several years ago through friends, and the more I learn about it, the more comfortable and hopeful I feel about having a compassionate, informed advocate on our side. I shared this news with my mom and met with a surprising amount of resistance. When I've tried to talk with her about it, she's been extremely closed off and snarky. She won't open up to me about why she's so seemingly angry about it, but it's intense. It all came to a head this morning and I think that the topic is something I will be uncomfortable broaching for a long while. My main concern now is that Julie, who we want to hire, will be treated poorly by my mom. Learning from her reaction, we decided to try a different approach with Dan's parents and wrote them an email that included Julie's contract as well as a couple articles about what doulas are. Now I'm anxiously awaiting a response from them.

On another note, Emma has been moving around like crazy this week! I'm finally seeing her move in my abdomen, though Dan hadn't yet. So one afternoon, when she was particularly wiggly, I video taped it and send it to Dan. Then later, I shared it with our moms and a couple friends. So much fun! And by now he's seen it in person too!

As for me, I'm still facing acid reflux. Between that and some hip pain, sleeping is becoming a more of an obstacle. I keep hoping for some pretty good sleep before Emma arrives, because I know once she's here, sleep will become a rare commodity. As for Emma, she's was the size of a butternut squash at 26 weeks and is now the size of a "bunch of bananas" or a large cucumber at 27 weeks. Both of my apps say that Emma is over 2lbs now and around 15 or so inches long. It just seems so big!

I've read that I could start having contractions as my body prepares for birth. Emma is plumping up so she'll be ready to regulate her own body temperature after she's born. Her eyes are finally starting to open and she'll be more responsive to light, which we've definitely found to be true when we held a light up to my stomach! She definitely moved around when it was there. She's borrowing some of my antibodies to help her immune system. Soon, I'll get my flu shot at work so she'll be even better taken care of. Most of her bodily systems are intact and most of the rest of her development revolves around putting on height and weight. The doctor's office has added an iron supplement to my daily list of "to take" things. My recent blood tests show that I'm slightly anemic. So...it's been added and hopefully it's doing what it needs to.  

Next week, I'll be starting my third trimester! We have back to back appointments with the specialist and with the nurse practitioner. When we go to the doctor, we'll have our next ultrasound. They're also going to do an echo of Emma's heart. Apparently, when moms-to-be at their practice have some of the risk factors that I do, that's one of the things they do; check the heart more fully. I really hope everything's okay.

Last thing for now: I had been trying to come to terms with the reality that we couldn't hire someone to take photos of Dan and me while I'm pregnant. I had really been wanting that because it's a really special time and it may or may not be the only time we experience pregnancy and expecting a baby. I cried to him one night, realizing that there were so many other things we needed to spend money on. Instead of letting the subject die there, he reached out to a photography group he's involved with. Within 24 hours, we had three photographers step up to say they would take "trade for" photos for us. Trade for, or "tf" means that they'll be free, though the photographer will be able to use them on their websites and whatnot. It's like what Dan does with many of his models. We're hoping to do shoots at the beach, at a local park, and downtown. I've been thinking about outfits we might wear to each. I was so excited and grateful! So we'll have even more photographs to document this time than I could have hoped for!