Reconnection

I have a dear friend of mine who has made a beautiful proposal for us. She wants to be digital pen pals. The proposal came with specifics. I hope she doesn't mind me sharing as I'm going to ask for permission after the fact. She wrote, "I would like to make a commitment/covenant with you to email each other once per week. I could email you on Tuesdays and you could email me on Thursdays (or whatever days we decide on). It wouldn't have to take up too much time, but we could just check in with each other, stay up on life events, be encouraging to one another through the tough times."

I immediately loved the idea. After some discussion, we have also agreed to send a letter or postcard to each at least once a month! I'm very excited. What first struck me about it was the honor of being asked to take part in this endeavor with a very dear friend. I also was extremely grateful for the mutuality it implied. There have been many times in email or handwritten letter writings that I've felt like I'm putting forth all the effort. And while the writing is beneficial for me, it is so much more life-giving to have someone on the receiving end who is also actively committed to the connection.

It's also extremely lovely to feel loved. I have some very dear friends in my life. And at times when I feel like I can't land my feet on anything solid, it's incredible to have the sense of grounding that my close friends give me.

I may have written about this before, but there is a Celtic phrase that deeply moves me. It's the idea of "anam cara" which translates to "soul friend."  John O'Donahue has written a book about this concept. In it he writes, "The anam cara was a person to whom you could reveal the hidden intimacies of your life. This friendship was an act of recognition and belonging. When you had an anam cara, your friendship cut across all convention and category. You were joined in an ancient and eternal way with the friend of your soul."

I truly and deeply believe that I have more than one anam cara in my life. Which is interesting because although I feel like I have a warm personality, I don't necessarily open up myself deeply to people. There have been many occasions when I've learned that someone else feels closer to me than I feel to them. The lack of mutuality in these situations seems to come from my unwillingness, or even fear, of being fully myself with another person. But despite my own reluctance, I have somehow been blessed with deep closeness from several people. People who know me, love me, have supported me through years of friendship and who, I genuinely hope, I have made feel the same sense of love and acceptance. With them, I belong.

So here's to a covenant with my friend! A covenant to intentionally stay close and connected to one another despite our separation of many miles. And here's to my anam caras. Spread out all over the country, but so near and dear to my heart.

Blessings,
Kelley

The "Storyteller" Assignment

Today's chapter with Ms. Cameron was short and to the point. Stop straining so hard to make a story up! Settle down, chill out, and listen for the story that's ready to be told through you. I've heard this described on many occasions in various expressions, but usually it sounds something like this, "It was as though the story was already formed and I was just there to write it down." The image I have here is a tornado of words and images swirling high above a receptive writer. I picture myself flying down headfirst with their stories in a furious spiral toward the writer, eventually crashing with their pen as it flies across the page! It's all rather adventurous!

Frankly, I've been skeptical of this concept. The story as an almost separate being simply out to find the right conduit? Or perhaps envious is more accurate. Either way, I have not experienced this personally. If it really is a true experience and really does exist for some people, why not me? Julia Cameron suggests it's because I'm trying too hard to create impressive words all on my own rather than listening to what's around me. I'm going to give this a shot. Maybe I'll carve out some time this weekend to just...be...and listen. We'll see what comes from it. She suggests letting go so the creative process can work in and through you. I shall try. As Barney, from "How I Met Your Mother" might say, "Challenge accepted!"

The writing assignment from this chapter is as follows: "Pretend that you are sitting under a large tree with your back resting on its trunk. On the other side of the tree, a Storyteller sits also resting against the tree trunk. Take a sheet of paper and number from one to five. Tell the Storyteller five things you'd like to hear stories about." I've decided to type my list here rather than write them in my notebook. So here they are:

1. I'd like to hear a story about the diligent and hard-working person who is hopeful about a life filled with more meaning. I want to hear a story about how opportunity finally knocked for them and new hope was born as they skipped along toward their happy ending.

2. I'd like to hear a story about the committed and loving couple who, having longed for a child for years, finally have their dreams realized in a sweet, healthy addition to their family.

3. I'd like to hear a story about an adventurous woman who traveled the world in search of new experiences and opportunities to bring love and peace into a hurting world.

4. I'd like to hear a story about a child who opened the hearts of adults by being loving, kind, and unwilling to accept the boundaries and walls we create in adulthood.

5. I'd like to hear a story about the family that loves each other no matter what and that, rather than avoiding the difficulties of life, face them together through love, support, and encouragement.

Okay, so one thing is for sure from my list. I like my happy endings. As a friend just wrote today, "I don't need art to imitate life. I want a movie with a damn happy ending....tied up neatly." Well apparently, so do I. it also seems to be a theme that I don't necessarily need the whole story to be sugarcoated. But I am a fan of love, peace, hard work, hopefulness, and positivity winning out in the end.

I also see that none of the stories I want told are entirely new. I can think of several stories already out there that would fit into one of more of these categories. But still, it was a cathartic and energizing process to write them down for myself. Maybe I'll settle more into these ideas when I sit back this weekend and allow the process of creativity to lead me where it chooses.

More to come!

Blessed be,
Kelley

Big Steps!

Alright! It's happening. My husband and I are taking steps to step KelDan Art! One day last weekend, I created: a facebook page (which already has 32 friends in less than a week!); a Paypal account (for future orders, I hope), an Etsy page (which I still need to download products on)!

We've been looking at creating a website (soon to be www.keldanart.com!!!) and finding out what steps we need to take to get a KelDan Art business license! It's all really exciting, but scary at the same time. I keep worrying about the negative "What if..." scenarios. So in an effort to avoid that I've been pulling strength from some quotes I've been reading about following your destiny.

Here are some of them, the first being a paraphrase because it's from "The Men Who Stare At Goats" and I don't have a way of finding out if it's accurate yet.

You have to find your destiny. If you try to do something that's not your destiny, it'll be like swimming against the tide of the river. But if you find and pursue your destiny, the river will carry you."

I really like the idea of the river carrying me. It feels hopeful, when I'm scared.

The purpose of art is not a rarified, intellectual distillate-it is life, intensified, brilliant life. -Alain Arias-Misson

The most potent muse of all is our own inner child. -Stephen Nachmanovitch

At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities. -Jean Houston

This one is especially potent to me at the moment, because I'm realizing how much I don't laugh in my life right now.

So you are, imagination needs moodling-long, inefficient, happy idling, dawdling and puttering. _Brenda Ueland

This I find a good reminder that our world is very driven by doing, doing, doing. And sometimes, I want to sit, and think, and be. And even if the end "product" of this isn't tangible, I need the reminder that it's still worth it.

That's plenty for now!

Here's to art, inspiration, hope, change, and following my destiny!!