As I was continuing my reading of The Feminine Face of God last night, I was struck by a couple passages I wanted to share here.
The first: "We had to ask, What is the face of God that can be revealed through women? We proposed to look for the answers to this question by studying the life stories of thirty women across North America who were recognized in their communities as sources of spiritual inspiration."
The question at the center of the authors' research is very interesting. What IS the face of God that can be revealed through women? I'm so curious about the results they found because they've alluded to similarities among the responses. I hope to connect with some of the feelings and thoughts that were shared. Their intention was to interview 30 women, but in the end they interviewed more than 100.
As for myself, my first thoughts are that my own spirituality and femininity is tied up with nature. I wonder if this has something to do with our menstrual cycles naturally lining up with the moon cycle? Very clearly, there is a connection and physical pull tied in with the rhythm of nature.
When reading that they were planning to interview women who were "recognized in their communities as sources of spiritual inspiration" I was brought up short. I work as a hospice and hospital chaplain everyday. But would I be considered a source of "spiritual inspiration" within the community? I just don't know. It made me realize that I would like to continue the steps within the Unitarian Universalist Association to be "fellowshipped," which is the process by which ministers in the UU Church are endorsed by the larger association. It's what ordination is in many other church organizations.
To have this support and endorsement would make me feel like a larger part of the faith tradition of which I've chosen to belong. It's the difference between being a Chaplain who is Unitarian Universalist and being a Unitarian Universalist Chaplain. The problem is, I have a difficult time trying to navigate the process that I'm coming at sideways. I wish I could have an advisor and guide as one does in college to help sort through the requirements of particular degree programs. But if I don't take any steps, I'll never get anywhere. So I've reached out to a couple of people regarding writing me letters to help me sidestep a part of the process which I'm hoping will be deemed unnecessary considering how many years I've been in ministry as a Chaplain.
The last set of thoughts I want to get out for this blog post is about my need to connect with feminism and my own personal womanhood. I'm pretty sure it has to do with my desire to become a mom and my uncertainty whether or not my life path will include that role. Do I believe that women can be wholly feminine without being a mother? Of course! But I find that this is an expression of womanhood of which I hope to be a part. In the meantime, I want to connect with what it means to be a woman without being a mother. I was born into this group and want to more fully embrace what that could mean. Moreover, I want to more intentionally become a part of the spirituality of womanhood. Which brings me to the other concept brought forth by The Feminine Face of God.
The authors explain that at the beginning of their time together trying to map out their research for the book, they "walked outside and sat down opposite each other under the protective branches of a large oak tree. And there we did something we were to do almost every day for the next several years of our collaboration. We closed our eyes, sat in silence, and waited." I don't always feel connected to myself and my spirituality in silence, but I do think it's worth making time to settle into to deep thinking, listening, and feeling of the sacred. And the idea of doing this with someone else seems worthy of the vulnerability and openness that would inevitably be required.
More thoughts to come!
Showing posts with label Vocation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Vocation. Show all posts
Monday, May 19, 2014
Monday, November 29, 2010
An Honor and a Privilege
Last week, the day before Thanksgiving, I started work early and didn't stop for lunch so that I could get off early and begin my Thanksgiving holiday early. Little did I know that the day would take a devastating and surprising turn. I was finishing up my charting in my car of the Harris Teeter parking lot waiting to get some last minute items for Thanksgiving, when I received a call.
The call was from the secretary from the church I grew up in. And although I am no longer a part of their church, denomination or even religion, I was called because there was a pastoral emergency and their church minister was out of town. A family that I have known for several years suffered a tragic loss. A child, not quite four months old, died suddenly. I went straight to the hospital and spent the next couple of hours with the family in the midst of raw, painful grief. As a Hospice Chaplain turned Hospital Chaplain turned Hospice Chaplain again, I've been around this type of situation before. But it was different being with people I had known for so long. More proof that my yearning to be a Parish Minister is the right choice for me.
Tomorrow, I'm assisting in the Funeral Service. I'm nervous, but honored. May the service begin a healing process for this family as they grieve for the unthinkable. Blessed be.
The call was from the secretary from the church I grew up in. And although I am no longer a part of their church, denomination or even religion, I was called because there was a pastoral emergency and their church minister was out of town. A family that I have known for several years suffered a tragic loss. A child, not quite four months old, died suddenly. I went straight to the hospital and spent the next couple of hours with the family in the midst of raw, painful grief. As a Hospice Chaplain turned Hospital Chaplain turned Hospice Chaplain again, I've been around this type of situation before. But it was different being with people I had known for so long. More proof that my yearning to be a Parish Minister is the right choice for me.
Tomorrow, I'm assisting in the Funeral Service. I'm nervous, but honored. May the service begin a healing process for this family as they grieve for the unthinkable. Blessed be.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
New Chapter and a Vocation of Love
This morning I woke up with a greater sense of purpose than I typically have as of late. I'm approaching a new phase in my life. This "in-between" time didn't last as long as I expected, and somewhat feared.
This has been my life for the last couple of months:
I completed my Chaplain Residency at New Hanover Regional Medical Center on August 20th. On August 21st my dad's sister passed away. She had been sick for a while. I thought I was more prepared for her dying, but it rocked me worse than I could have imagined. The following couple of weeks were spent in harsh grief, helping my parents go through her apartment, and trying to be there for my dad. Meanwhile, I continued to try and look for a job. I had some interviews, but nothing really came of them. I didn't even tell my family about some of the interviews, because the outlook of so many didn't look good, and therefore I was less torn down than I would have been having to share the "I didn't get the job news" repeatedly.
I did interview for a Hospice Chaplain position, but weeks went by and I didn't hear anything. But, it turns out there had been some internal inquiry about the job and eventually, I was offered the position. I begin on Monday. Right now, I'm working my last on-call shift at NHRMC. I can really feel the end of this particular chapter closing. It's an odd feeling, but I'm glad I'm aware of it.
I have mixed feelings about going into hospice again. Hospice is a wonderful gift. It's an incredible, loving service and I will be proud to be a part of it again. But Hospice is also a narrower ministry. Not narrow in depth. But narrower in that it is singularly focused on end-of-life. Hospital Chaplaincy was a bit more broad. While still crisis ministry, there was hope and healing mixed in. Parish Ministry is the ministry I have discerned seems to be the best fit for me. Someday... But in the meantime, I am gratefully surprised that I can still don the current title of "Chaplain" having supposed I would have to temporarily relinquish a ministerial title.
And that's what's going on with me.
In broader, national news, there have been several suicides among gay teens that has led to a growing awareness of bullying both in schools and in society at large. Ellen Degeneres, in particular, has been asking many of her guests about their own experiences with bullying. These deaths and the treatment of gay youth has sparked in me such an indignant anger that I have been spinning my wheels trying to think of things to do. Facebook has been a helpful outlet for me. I can share with this larger social network my beliefs that Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, Queer, Questioning, and Allied persons deserve love, care, compassion, and equal rights. I have been told from more than one person on facebook that I have my facts wrong and that "The Bible says...". But as a person with theological training, I believe the Bible was written in a particular social context and historical time. And though I absolutely believe that it has wonderful relevance for many in the present, I do not think it should be used to devalue people who were born non-heterosexual.
The local University in my town had a rally and vigil this week sponsored by the GLBTQIA (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, Intersex, Ally) Resource Office. I created four new posters for marriage (and life!) equality. I was grateful to unite with so many people and to feel like I was DOING something in response to all the hate that led to so many suicides.
I was also so proud of my Unitarian Universalist faith, because not only were many people from my local congregation present, but our minister was as well. She wore a clerical collar, easily distinguishing her as clergy in the masses. She had been asked to say a prayer. Prior to doing so, she shared that her experience from a bully was from the head of her religious group, who taught that people "like me" she said, were unnatural and wrong. She told the crowd that that was NOT so. She prayed not only for the people are are/were bullied, and the families of those who have lost or taken their lives because of hate, but also for the bullies. After her prayer, several people came up to her...one girl said something before collapsing into a hug. I wondered how many people had hurt this young girl. And further, how many of them represented a religious point of view. My minister was there to show her love. And this girl wasn't the only one to receive it.
I wonder how many people are unaware that there is a liberal religious faith like Unitarian Universalism that thinks that all people have worth and dignity, regardless of their sexual orientation. I felt a renewed sense of calling as I watched people approach my minister and ordination mentor, ask her about her church and receive her love and support...I wondered about the healing that began at the rally.
I absolutely want to become an ordained minister. I want to be someone whose life and love represents not only a larger religious organization, but also something Holy. I believe in a loving Spirit. I call it God. I call it the Universe. I call it Love. Religion has been used to hurt and divide. I want people to feel loved for exactly who they are. May it be so.
May all my liberal Christian ministers and friends have their loving voices heard. May their lives and their ministries shower people with love and acceptance. And may their care and openness increase in volume. I add this to acknowledge that Unitarian Universalism is not the only loving religious home for people who are GLBTQQIA. Gene Robinson, a bishop in the Episcopal Church was one minister who spoke up in youtube's "It Gets Better" campaign. You can hear him here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mPZ5eUrNF24
Here are some other links of interest:
Fort Worth City Councilman, Joel Burns sharing his "It Gets Better" story: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ax96cghOnY4
The Trevor Project: http://www.thetrevorproject.org/
Personal account from my CST colleague, Casey Crosbie: http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/caseygcrosbie/1/1286387828/tpod.html?utm_source=FB&utm_medium=FBMTB&utm_content=FBStreamPostTitle
Mormon leader gives Anti-Gay sermon after suicides. Here's a link to write an open letter in response, and to view the sermon: https://secure3.convio.net/hrc/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=945
Human Rights Campaign: http://www.hrc.org//
I'm still looking for loving responses to the hate. And I shall continue to look, act, and love.
This has been my life for the last couple of months:
I completed my Chaplain Residency at New Hanover Regional Medical Center on August 20th. On August 21st my dad's sister passed away. She had been sick for a while. I thought I was more prepared for her dying, but it rocked me worse than I could have imagined. The following couple of weeks were spent in harsh grief, helping my parents go through her apartment, and trying to be there for my dad. Meanwhile, I continued to try and look for a job. I had some interviews, but nothing really came of them. I didn't even tell my family about some of the interviews, because the outlook of so many didn't look good, and therefore I was less torn down than I would have been having to share the "I didn't get the job news" repeatedly.
I did interview for a Hospice Chaplain position, but weeks went by and I didn't hear anything. But, it turns out there had been some internal inquiry about the job and eventually, I was offered the position. I begin on Monday. Right now, I'm working my last on-call shift at NHRMC. I can really feel the end of this particular chapter closing. It's an odd feeling, but I'm glad I'm aware of it.
I have mixed feelings about going into hospice again. Hospice is a wonderful gift. It's an incredible, loving service and I will be proud to be a part of it again. But Hospice is also a narrower ministry. Not narrow in depth. But narrower in that it is singularly focused on end-of-life. Hospital Chaplaincy was a bit more broad. While still crisis ministry, there was hope and healing mixed in. Parish Ministry is the ministry I have discerned seems to be the best fit for me. Someday... But in the meantime, I am gratefully surprised that I can still don the current title of "Chaplain" having supposed I would have to temporarily relinquish a ministerial title.
And that's what's going on with me.
In broader, national news, there have been several suicides among gay teens that has led to a growing awareness of bullying both in schools and in society at large. Ellen Degeneres, in particular, has been asking many of her guests about their own experiences with bullying. These deaths and the treatment of gay youth has sparked in me such an indignant anger that I have been spinning my wheels trying to think of things to do. Facebook has been a helpful outlet for me. I can share with this larger social network my beliefs that Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, Queer, Questioning, and Allied persons deserve love, care, compassion, and equal rights. I have been told from more than one person on facebook that I have my facts wrong and that "The Bible says...". But as a person with theological training, I believe the Bible was written in a particular social context and historical time. And though I absolutely believe that it has wonderful relevance for many in the present, I do not think it should be used to devalue people who were born non-heterosexual.
The local University in my town had a rally and vigil this week sponsored by the GLBTQIA (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, Intersex, Ally) Resource Office. I created four new posters for marriage (and life!) equality. I was grateful to unite with so many people and to feel like I was DOING something in response to all the hate that led to so many suicides.
I was also so proud of my Unitarian Universalist faith, because not only were many people from my local congregation present, but our minister was as well. She wore a clerical collar, easily distinguishing her as clergy in the masses. She had been asked to say a prayer. Prior to doing so, she shared that her experience from a bully was from the head of her religious group, who taught that people "like me" she said, were unnatural and wrong. She told the crowd that that was NOT so. She prayed not only for the people are are/were bullied, and the families of those who have lost or taken their lives because of hate, but also for the bullies. After her prayer, several people came up to her...one girl said something before collapsing into a hug. I wondered how many people had hurt this young girl. And further, how many of them represented a religious point of view. My minister was there to show her love. And this girl wasn't the only one to receive it.
I wonder how many people are unaware that there is a liberal religious faith like Unitarian Universalism that thinks that all people have worth and dignity, regardless of their sexual orientation. I felt a renewed sense of calling as I watched people approach my minister and ordination mentor, ask her about her church and receive her love and support...I wondered about the healing that began at the rally.
I absolutely want to become an ordained minister. I want to be someone whose life and love represents not only a larger religious organization, but also something Holy. I believe in a loving Spirit. I call it God. I call it the Universe. I call it Love. Religion has been used to hurt and divide. I want people to feel loved for exactly who they are. May it be so.
May all my liberal Christian ministers and friends have their loving voices heard. May their lives and their ministries shower people with love and acceptance. And may their care and openness increase in volume. I add this to acknowledge that Unitarian Universalism is not the only loving religious home for people who are GLBTQQIA. Gene Robinson, a bishop in the Episcopal Church was one minister who spoke up in youtube's "It Gets Better" campaign. You can hear him here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mPZ5eUrNF24
Here are some other links of interest:
Fort Worth City Councilman, Joel Burns sharing his "It Gets Better" story: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ax96cghOnY4
The Trevor Project: http://www.thetrevorproject.org/
Personal account from my CST colleague, Casey Crosbie: http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/caseygcrosbie/1/1286387828/tpod.html?utm_source=FB&utm_medium=FBMTB&utm_content=FBStreamPostTitle
Mormon leader gives Anti-Gay sermon after suicides. Here's a link to write an open letter in response, and to view the sermon: https://secure3.convio.net/hrc/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=945
Human Rights Campaign: http://www.hrc.org//
I'm still looking for loving responses to the hate. And I shall continue to look, act, and love.
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